Secret Garden

Kayla | 27 | bisexual | nonbinary

Photography is my hobby and my passion. Mostly digital or phone photos, though I'm starting to break into film as well 📷
everything in my photography tags belongs to me
please don't repost my work

I also reblog things I'm interested in and love seeing and sharing any kind of art on here 🖤

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naiad reblogged babushka

Question

babushka -

Is this thing about love that you only get butterflies when you see them for like 3years or so and then you just. Learn to tolerate each other for the rest of your life together? Do butterflies disappear when you live together? Do you wake up every morning and go "aight, love takes work so i'll do my best to choose them again today (whatever that means? choose not to hate them?) and that's gonna be hard"? I've read way too many posts about love, how does it work


naiad -

I've been married for 8 years and while the butterflies calm down they never completely go away. Sometimes I'll just look at him and they start fluttering all over again or he'll say something that just makes me think "oh man I love this guy".



Notes
fallow reblogged this post from babushka
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idealist-musings reblogged this post from babushka:

Exp Lvl: 3 years of healthy closed polycule


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babushka reblogged this post from autiestella:

this is really important, and i agree that building communication is something that needs to be worked on. especially between neurodivergent people (and looking around, i sometimes forget neurotypicals exist. the generation of our parents has been through a lot and the 90s weren't exactly the best time to raise healthy children sadly). so yeah, this has a lot of good points.


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roguewolfiii reblogged this post from naiad:

butterflies happen more when you're still a little unsure around each other, when there's still things to learn about each other and surprises to be found. If your swarm of butterflies has settled down and now sleeps comfortably in your stomach then that means you're completely relaxed around your person, not every single sleepy smile or gentle giggle or soft kiss sends them into a fluttering frenzy - but that doesn't mean the love isn't still there, it just means that you're used to it. You're familiar with all the little ways that signal their love for you, you know all the small habits that tell you what they're feeling and thinking, there are few surprises left, and even some of those surprises don't send your butterflies swirling in quite the same way because you know them, you know what this love means, how it moves, what it smells of, the feel of it against you. Your feelings go from being skittish and easily flustered to calm and comfortable and secure in that knowledge of love, and that's not a bad thing at all.


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naiad reblogged this post from babushka:

I've been married for 8 years and while the butterflies calm down they never completely go away. Sometimes I'll just look at him and they start fluttering all over again or he'll say something that just makes me think "oh man I love this guy".


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cjadewyton commented:

Love is safety, imo. You might get "used" to the company so that it's not exciting like a rollercoaster, but the good feelings should never completely go away. I've been living with Charlie over 3 years and dating her over 11, and I still get butterflies when I wake up and see her. The hard work should never be "I'm working to feel love at all", but "I'm working to make sure we're both as happy as we can be, so the feelings don't ever fade". Also, over 20 years my biological parents lived together, and they still both lit up happily whenever they walked into a room together! :)


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autiestella reblogged this post from babushka:

stella 5 yrs w bf! been ldr wholetime, but hope help abit -


princeofdoom reblogged this post from babushka:

Having been with my husband in some form for more than a decade and married 3 1/2 years, I don't think the butterflies ever completely go away, but you do get into a comfortable rhythm with them for the most part.


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